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Forgotten again

Today, my team won an award. Unfortunately, whoever sent out the invites forgot to include me, so it went on without me. Do I feel undervalued? A bit. But, looking on the bright side, at least it keeps my face out of the public domain. Small mercies. In any case, here we must delve into …

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Anything

What am I here for, and what is my role? It seems that not only am I required to do my own job — already the work of a team in any other organisation — but also pick up the work of the team I have moved into. It’s a puzzlement to me, honestly. But …

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Insistent

“You’re visiting Antalya? Then you must drop in to see us in Adana.” But that’s 600km away! “No, no, I insist. I’ll be expecting you.” And just like that, all of our plans unfurl.

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Forever derided

Are people laughing at me? Or am I paranoid? I’m delivering virtual training to a group of staff. Two women sitting together look at me, then immediately burst into laughter. My first reaction is to assume they’re mocking me. But, of course, I’m not in the room there with them, and their microphone is muted. …

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Too shy

When I think of all the things I wanted to do in life but was too shy to pursue, I must admit that this dominant character trait of mine is debilitating.

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What’s up?

Mum and dad sit opposite each other, having a texting conversation via WhatsApp, lest our revising kids tell us off again. Shhh!

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Royal visit

You can always tell when my parents are visiting. That’s the day I mow the lawn, wash the car, blitz the weeds, tidy the bookshelves, take out the rubbish, trim my beard, and put on my best clothes. Ah, and stand up straight? No, that’s an ask too far. Four decades a slouch. We will …

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Self-reproach

I’m the kind of person whose inner conversation while gardening is all self-reproach, traversing through time back across decades. “Stupid! You’re so stupid. So stupid.” On and on, all afternoon long.

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Chillimoon

We don’t have a perfect relationship. Nor would we claim to. We both have a propensity to wind each other up and disagree at times. Relationships are often about making compromises and overlooking each other’s foibles. And, more than that, remembering our own faults and shortcomings before dwelling on another’s. In the end, it might …

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Family feuds

People criticise me for not learning to speak Turkish properly. But, honestly, I’m perfectly content, as it keeps me out of all-consuming family feuds. Well, that and living 2,700 miles away. I recommend that everyone keeps their inlaws at a healthy distance. Even if I could speak Turkish fluently, I’d still play dumb.

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Mythical being

“Where are all the good men?” she sobs, lonely and afraid. Dare we break this to her? There are no good men. We are all compromised in some way. None is perfect. You’re just going to have to settle for a “trying his best” man. He might be kind but not wealthy. Or wealthy but …

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Realistic role models

Is Andrew Tate really to blame for an alleged rise in sexism and misogyny amongst young men, or is he just a convenient scapegoat for society-wide issues? Not long ago, I noticed a worrying shift in a young man’s attitudes — misogynistic language creeping into his speech. He doesn’t have access to Andrew Tate’s content, but …

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Unhelpful

“Help your dad,” says his mum. “I will, I will,” he yells back. Though evidently not while I actually need help. He’ll come to my aid after I’ve finished. Maybe.

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Interpreter

Funnily enough, I occupy the role of interpretive layer between the techies of IT and the non-techies of the rest of the organisation. I’m the intermediary who tries to explain in simple terms what each side is talking about. Who knew a Simple Simon could be so helpful?

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Do no harm

Is our faith relevant to the times we live in? For many of our detractors, of course, the answer is a hard no: it is irrelevant at best, if not outright harmful. But is that really so? One of the central principles I have learnt is that in moments of uncertainty, our faith teaches us …

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