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I should really have listened to my conscience, which said to me: “You don’t need yet another device.”

I justified this one on the basis it was affordable and had plenty of space for backing up all of my files.

But as with most things that seem a bit too good to be true, this refurbished unit came with two rather major issues for one thinking it might enable him to revive his writing.

The first was evident the moment I prised open the lid to touch its keys. Set beneath a truly fabulous display, the keyboard was clearly a dud. Or rather, half of it was.

One side is just lovely to type on: just the kind of keyboard I like. But the other side: I can only imagine its previous owner spilt a drink on it, or thumped it in rage, for it produces a horrible crackling sound, as if typing on an old plastic bag.

And then I turned it on, only to discover the fan noise which would introduce me to the bustling support forums teeming with hundreds of execs complaining about their extremely expensive laptop.

The second deal breaker for the aspiring writer with super-sensitive hearing. I cannot bear noise when I’m writing, least of all an obtrusive white noise whirring constantly.

So, of course, it is a return, to be sent back where it came from, in an acknowledgement of the better half of myself, which had already petitioned me to show restraint.

What a shame: it could have been perfect, so lightweight and portable. But no, an unjustifiable compromise. As I had already petitioned myself before I succumbed to the greedy voice in my head: “Just make do with what you have!”

[Update: I strike through the fan issue, because it seems to have gone. Which leads me to suppose that the issue may have been caused by BitLocker’s high CPU usage when enabled.]