Once more, we learn the pitfalls of enjoying a promiscuous lifestyle. Or worse, of being promiscuous while inebriated, high or comatosed. Not all who encounter you necessarily recall events the same way you do.
Most of us who went to university knew those who fell into this category. We witnessed their behaviour in halls, as they attempted to sleep with every female student who crossed paths with them.
It didn’t require much sensitivity to see that their behaviour often seemed to cross a line. Like the time one of them invited a friend of mine up to his room. Embarrassed, she brushed him off, telling him that she wasn’t looking for a boyfriend.
“Just sleep with me then,” he laughed, which might have been funny if that wasn’t his modus operandi. In truth, he wasn’t looking for someone special either. He was just enjoying himself while he could, pursuing one transient relationship after another.
For many young people, this is just how relationships operate. It is the norm, they believe, and a fundamental right. It’s only as they get older that they may start to question some of those assumptions. If they have conscience, they may now recall past encounters ashamed. On the other hand, they may remain a source of pride, buttressing their sense of self.
Either way, an appeal to their youth or inexperience turns out to be no defence in a court of law. A crime committed at eighteen, though hidden for a lifetime, can still result in a lengthy prison sentence, as many a disgraced celebrity and gang member has discovered to their peril.
A stable or formal relationship isn’t necessarily immune to abuse, but it does offer protections not available to those engaged in casual liaisons. If the relationship is consensual, it is likely to be built on trust and feelings of mutual respect. Ideas harder to establish in the fleeting entanglements nowadays passed off as the norm.
The easiest way to protect yourself from unsavoury accusations in years to come is to shun a promiscuous lifestyle altogether. Save yourself for someone special who in time will appear on your radar, often when you’re least expecting it. The peer pressure to conform may well be immense, but be patient and you will be rewarded. That is certainly assured.
Last modified: 17 September 2023
