For me, it was like at first sight.

According to collective wisdom, we should then have dated for several years, until like blossomed into love.

Only at that point should I have proposed to her, however many years later, making way for a great big wedding.

We did everything backwards, apparently, marrying quickly, before we could say with any certainty that it would work out.

Indeed, that was one of the many arguments put to me against my rush to marry. “What if it doesn’t work out? You’ll then be stuck with her.”

I had to point out that we were not members of the Roman Catholic Church, which does not recognise divorce.

If it did not work out, we would probably just go our separate ways. That, of course, would apply to any relationship on earth.

In our time, more people are not married than tie the knot. Many choose to cohabit soon after meeting, without ever considering marriage.

And, for many of my peers, it was considered perfectly normal to spend the night with someone they had only just met, whether at a club or online.

Is it not like at first sight for many of these too? Our fault, it seems, was simply trying to do the right thing. To let like become love within the confines of marriage.

And so it did. Was it a risk? Well, of course. But then all relationships share that risk.

Might we have done things differently? Naturally! With the wisdom of age, now far removed from events, we see we could have taken a completely different approach.

But we were young, following our hearts. Not much different from any other couple, really.

Unusual, perhaps, to have met in spring and be married by summer. But that was twenty-three years ago, so I’m not fussed.

It was like at first sight, and then God put love and mercy between us.

And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in tranquillity with them, and He has put love and mercy between you: verily in that are Signs for those who reflect.

Quran 30:21

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