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Not long ago, I thought I was standing up for truth and justice, and all that is good and virtuous. Now I doubt what I was defending, absolutely.

What if I was completely mistaken? What if my conclusions and assumptions were all wrong? What if the information I gathered was suspect? What if my efforts to determine the truth simply misled me?

Self-doubt has now crept into every interaction, causing me to regret what once seemed a duty: to witness to the truth even against our own selves, accountable before God alone. Now I wonder: was I mistaken?

May God forgive me if I was. May God have mercy on my soul if I thought I was standing up for virtue and opposing vice, but was in truth completely misguided. May God guide me if in attempting to set things straight I had in fact gone far astray.

The Quran says:

“And do not mix the truth with falsehood or conceal the truth while you know it.“

Quran 2:42

But it also says:

“O you who have believed, if there comes to you a disobedient one with information, investigate, lest you harm a people out of ignorance and become, over what you have done, regretful.”

Quran 49:6

It is so easy in the moment to think you’re doing the right thing. For a time, I was sure of it, but now I doubt all things. Most of all the impulsivities of my soul, which frequently command me to action.

Not long ago, I thought I was standing up for truth and justice, and all that is good and virtuous. Now I doubt more or less everything.