My wife and I come from opposite ends of the spectrum. I was raised amidst wealth and privilege, wanting for nothing. She was raised amidst poverty and hardship, often deprived.
In our life together, we have met somewhere in the middle of this spectrum, raising our children neither amidst excessive wealth nor abject poverty. By this stage in our lives, we’re doing just okay.
Having lived a childhood in difficult circumstances — her family directly affected by a military coup to devastating effect — my wife is firmer on what she sees as wasting money than I am.
I guess I was a spoilt child, getting whatever I asked for. Our kids, by contrast, almost have to make a business case to mum for whatever they have their heart set on now. She is firmly of the “money doesn’t grow on trees” school of thought.
This approach, I must admit, has worked well for us. Although we had some trying times in the early years, as I struggled to obtain proper work and a living wage, we have found a happy medium ever since.
Coming from a background like mine, and comparing myself to my wider family and peers, it can sometimes be hard to appreciate what we have achieved. But the reality? In living modest lives, we have achieved financial independence, alhamdulilah.
Mostly, by God’s mercy, we have been the beneficiaries of timing alone. Most would have overlooked the house we chose to make our home, given its location and state of disrepair, but we saw in that an opportunity.
True, we would then shiver through a few cold winters, living with rotting window frames while we paid off our debts. A modernised kitchen would have to wait a decade. Here we are forever guided by that eternal rule, “Verily after difficulty comes ease.”
Contentment is a great blessing. To be granted a contented companion, a greater blessing still. Contentment certainly brings ease. Envy, on the other hand, only disaster. Chasing after what others have has no end.
To be content in yourself is the greatest gift of all. I know I have been knocked off course over the past couple of years, suddenly encountering my peers after a long absence. Their success and status sent me into a downward tailspin.
Emerging on the other side, I realise how unjust and ungrateful I have been, contentment set aside. In truth, what I see as status in others, perhaps they just see as the means to pay off the mortgage.
“I am content,” my wife tells me, seeing how far we have travelled together. “So you should be too. Just say alhamdulilah!”
Alhamdulilah for such blessings.
Last modified: 14 January 2023
