Gone

The trouble with blogging is that you have no idea who your readers are. This can be both a blessing and a curse. Mostly I take solace and refuge in that anonymity, but every now and then something happens which causes me to pause for thought. No, not so much pause: I will be found scrambling to immediately unpublish everything.

The truth is, I have no idea what your intentions are. A few make their intentions clear, bestowing likes within thirty seconds of a post being published, when they couldn’t possibly have been able to read my latest long-winded ramble; these are the attention seekers, begging me to reciprocate and follow their blog to increase their ad revenue or sense of self-worth.

One or two readers, I believe are genuine, presumably interested in a little I have to say. Occasionally, they are people I know, who message me via WhatsApp to correct my atrocious spelling. Now and then they post a comment to let me know that they’re still lurking and value what I have to say.

But mostly I have no idea who descends here, and sometimes that alarms me. Sometimes I worry what their intentions are. And so sometimes I feel moved to unpublish everything, to protect those I love from the unknown intentions of complete strangers.

I admit that I remain as naive as ever, still thinking the best of people, despite having nothing to back up these assumptions. Here I am imagining that people are generally good, with good hearts and good intentions, compassionate and kind.

But for all I know, they could have completely different motives, sending me hurtling towards disaster. Plagiarists are of little concern, because nobody has ever been very interested in what I have to say. But what of others? In truth, I know nothing at all about those whose lives once momentarily crossed paths with mine, let alone complete strangers.

How foolish I am to assume goodness from the unknown unknowns who read my blog. To hope in goodness: that’s different; I want to believe in that. But I admit I have been naive and stupid, over-sharing in public my innermost thoughts and feelings. Now a vivid dream seen by my companion has given me pause for thought. I seek refuge in the One.

Be good, dear reader. Be as I imagine you to be: genuine, sincere, of sound heart, compassionate and kind, seeking goodness wherever it may be found. Have mercy on me and those I love.

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