I am continuously humbled by the generosity of my Lord, for no matter how far I fall, His Mercy is never failing. Over recent weeks I have made the tiniest steps back to Him, shunning the folly that evaporated a decade, and yet He has responded with great openings for me, brought forth without any effort on my part. They are too profound to articulate — or perhaps I am just too lazy to set it down — but it has touched me deeply.
For nearly eight years I have attended my local masjid and never understood a word the imam has said, yet in recent days a companion has sat at my side and whispered a translation of his lessons into my ear. MashaAllah, the imam is a humble man, though nonetheless wise and learned. In time doors are opened up to us, but we have to leave a little bit of ourselves behind before we can see and appreciate them.
I vaguely recall a saying of the past: your turning to Him is in fact His turning to you, or your turning to Him is fact His turning you to Him. It feels like I have handed over my affairs to Him and He has responded with perfect Mercy. Even the tiniest steps make a difference.