Here we are in a crowded night club. The college leaving party. We move across the dance floor, weaving through the revellers. The bassline of dance music thumps in the background.

We’re moving in on a young white man (Nobody) standing away from the dance floor, clearly completely out of place. As we get close to him, a young Gambian man (Somebody) walks up to him and whispers into his ear. ‘Nobody’ glances at ‘Somebody’, following him to a slightly quieter part of the club.

The camera cuts to them standing, talking. They are having to shout into each other’s ears because the music is so loud.

Somebody: “This party’s pathetic.”

Nobody: “You’re not kidding. I can’t relax.”

Somebody: “I’ve seen this girl I like, but she’s with her friend. I’ll offload her friend on you. Come on.”

Nobody: “I don’t think so, I’m just a nobody.”

Somebody: “Come on man, it’ll be good.”

The Gambian man leads Nobody over to the other side of the club. We follow. Somebody talks to the girl he liked, and then to her friend, a Somali girl. Somebody points towards Nobody. She looks towards Nobody and laughs.

Girl: “You must be joking!”

She laughs and laughs aloud. Back to Nobody. There is his face. It’s filled with rejection. The room has gone silent. All we can hear now is Nobody’s heartbeat. The girl is still laughing, in slow motion now. Turning to the dance floor, everyone has stopped dancing. They stand looking at Nobody, pointing at him and laughing too. The volume of the noise of laughter increases until the whole room is filled with laughter. Cut through black.

Nobody is now sitting at the bar with a bottle in his hand. He drinks a mouthful and then looks straight on. A young Asian man, Friend, walks up behind him and taps on his back. He shouts into Nobody’s ear over the music.

Friend: “There you are, I’ve been looking for you everywhere. I’ve found someone for you.”

Nobody: “Thanks, but I’m not in the mood. Didn’t come for that.”

Friend: “She’s waiting for you.”

They walk over to the girl. We follow. It is the same girl as before. Friend points at her.

Friend: “There she is.”

Nobody: “No man, she’s already told me to get lost once.”

Friend: “Just go for it.”

Nobody stands behind her for a few seconds. She does not turn to him. Eventually he walks over to her and she turns around.

Nobody: “Hi, I’ve been trying to relax into this. Will you come and cheer me up.”

The girl does not look at him. She just gets up and walks away. Nobody is left standing alone. Suddenly the room is empty and silent, and Nobody is the only person there. He is standing perfectly still. The surroundings around him morph into a mountain top. Tears are rolling down his face. Cut to black.

We’re in the centre of a grey room. It’s filled with a crowd. Around the edge, people are holding banners. We circle the room to read what they say: “Get lost!” “Go Home!” “Loser!” “Reject!”

Someone runs towards us, shouting: “We don’t want your type round here, you stupid loser!”

All the people in the room are pushing and shouting. They’re staring and angry.

We’re back in the club, Nobody left standing as the girl walks away. The bass continues to thump in the background. Everyone around him is having fun. Nobody turns to walk away, but just before he does, the random, repetitive beat of the music changes into a very cool, hip-hop beat. Nobody turns to the camera and a big grin fills his face. He shouts in his mock-Jamaican accent: “Ya, Mon!”

Nobody walks down onto the dance floor and starts to dance to the now brilliant music. He moves into the group with the Friend and Somebody, showing off. His friends smile as they see him dance. He moves in front of the girl who had rejected him and dances wildly to the music under strobe lighting. He does not look at her, his eyes are closed and he appears like he is in a trance. He moves away from the tight group and weaves his way through the rest of the crowd.

We’re floating above Nobody now. People stare at him as he dances through them, but he does not care. The number of people on the floor is reduced. He seems to be dancing constantly, but the people are disappearing as time accelerates past. Eventually only Nobody remains, dancing slowly now, until suddenly he falls to his knees, and then, backwards, down to the ground.

He lies on his back on the floor. His eyes are still shut. There is no smile on his face. We zoom in on his eyes until suddenly they open. Instantly cut to black.

Six Confessions of a Tortured Soul

  1. Nightmares
  2. Rejection
  3. Guilt
  4. Mistrust
  5. Loneliness
  6. Regret

Part two, 29 December 1995.

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